MMA Big Show UNSTOPPABLE RESULTS!

By Mike Menninger, FightTicker.com blogger

PICTURE CAPTION: Shoot on 3. Winner is "The Best Eva." Loser buys the Stroh's after the fights.

***That picture is not doctored. Hand to God.***

6:41 - I'm finally live, after a heck of a time getting my laptop set up (power cord, anyone?) and negotiating my first born for a username and password to get on the internet. Totally worth it though.

6:42 - The only thing that's happened, except for me running around for the last half hour trying to get up and running, is the ring girl photo shoot. Lacy Appleton, lovely wife of MMA Big Show president Jason Appleton, is a guest ring girl tonight.

6:43 - All of the ring girls are looking good. Raise your hand if you're a fan of underboob. [Raises hand.] Good times.

6:44 - Jon Niehaus is with me, and he's got the enviable task of taking photos of anything. ANYTHING. I think we have a gentleman's understanding. Anyway, God help him if he doesn't do his effing job tonight. Hopefully he'll get some good shots of the fights too.

6:46 - I know you're on pins and needles, but for those of you that had 6:35 in the "When are they going to play Drowning Pool" pool, go ahead and cash in your tickets.

6:49 - I'm going to the bathroom. I've to try to avoid the towel-hander-outer to save me a buck. I'll let you know how it goes.

6:51 - No one there. Thank God. I hate the awkwardness with that guy. Especially if he tries to up-sell me a rose. I guess I could give it Jon. He'll deal.

6:53 - Emcee for the evening in is his finest jeans, St. Louis Cardinals hat, and Doc Martens. He's introducing the band, Lorenzo. If memory serves me right, they were here back in April. The more things change, the more things stay the same. I sure hope the singer takes a digger off a speaker like he did the last time. I don't really want anyone to get hurt... but, c'mon... I'm just sayin'...

6:55 - I think I'm sitting at the judges' table. Last time, slightly fewer than 1 fight went to the scorecard. Wonder if these guys will have anything to do tonight. Maybe I'll lobby to be allowed to offer my input.

6:56 - I'm sure I look like the coolest guy in the room tapping away on my laptop.

6:57 - It's hot as eff when the lights are on, and it's rather chilly when they're off (like now, with the band playing). At least I'm sporting this light, yet, durable FightTicker.com t-shirt.

7:00 - Center Stage (the venue at Belterra) is looking rather full. While the soft, Garfunkel-like melodies of Lorenzo are a draw, I'm guessing most of them are here for the fights. I'll let you know if the crowd filters out when Lorenzo is done.

7:01 - Lorenzo is glad to be back here with the "Big Show MMA." Appleton just mouthed to me: "Close!" Maybe it's like Latin. Word order means nothing. Last song before the fights get underway.

7:06 - Slight technical difficulties. Everything's back online. The announcer (who's looking sharp tonight, by the way) is letting us know the time for talking is done, and the time for fighting is now. Not a real strong endorsement for what he's bringing to the table.

7:07 - Amateur Featherweight (145 lbs.) bout between Billy Bauer (BB) and Leando Banks (LB). Bauer has his cup on. And everyone here knows. That was a little weird. Better safe than sorry, I guess. Lacy Appleton gets us started, with cat calls and lots of applause. She's the MVP so far. In a landslide. Apparently it's "Bill" Bauer. And Banks is doing the Wanderlei hand roll. Sweet!

ROUND 1 - Touch em up. Both fighters dancing. Missed right from BB. Left hook from BB. LB backs up. Clinch with LB's back on the cage. BB with underhooks. Knees from LB. Near knee to the pills from BB. Another one. Better be careful! Turn and slam from BB. BB takes full mount. BB drops a big left, and as LB tries to stand, BB grabs LB's left arm for an armbar. BB holds it, and flips LB to the mat, cranking the elbow. LB is left with no choice but to tap with his face in the mat. Bill Bauer wins via armbar at 1:08 of the first round.

7:13 - Off to another epic pace here at the "Big Show MMA."

7:14 - Amateur Lightweight (155 lbs.) bout between Zach Ward (ZW) and John Platt (JP). I think I speak for everyone when I say we want more rounds. More rounds = more ring girls. Am I right? This ring girl has a nice smile. At least, I'm assuming.

ROUND 1 - Touch gloves. Circling. Short jab from ZW misses. Right leg kick from JP lands. More cirlcing. Quick exchange, nobody lands anything. Head kick from ZW misses. Another right leg kick. ZW rushes in, gets underhooks, and slams JP. ZW gets brief mount, but JP is able to stand quickly. ZW slams again!, but JP up quickly. Third big slam by ZW. ZW's corner telling him to take his back. ZW in side control against the cage, throwing rights to the head of JP. ZW slides to full mount, but JP holding him close. JP is pressed against the cage, but turns, sweeps and is in ZW's full guard. Short punches from the top, no damage being done though. Posture up from JP and ZW JUST misses an upkick... JP falls back down and gets the mount. They stand, but JP loses balance and falls, with ZW in the mount throwing punches as the horn sounds.

ROUND 2 - Touch gloves again. Circling. Clinch, and short knees from both fighters. Some sloppy punches from both fighters that miss. They clinch, JP attempts and judo throw over the hip, but ZW defends well. JP drops, but ZW grabs the guillotine and falls to the ground. He's pulling, but JP refuses to tap. JP pulls out, after patiently waiting. Smart fighting. JP in ZW's full guard. JP postures, and ZW looks for a triangle. Back to full guard. Some nice punches from the top. JP pushes ZW against the cage. ZW doing a decent job of keeping JP from getting any distance. Up kick from ZW. JP may have been on the ground. Ref stops the fight due to the upkick. JP is in good shape. Warning from ref to ZW. The action resumes. Short left from ZW and a right kick from JP . Missed right from JP They clinch against the cage as the horn sounds.

7:25 - Here comes Round 3, so says Lacy Appleton's placard. Nice to have you here tonight, Lacy. I mean that.

ROUND 3 - Touch gloves again. Good sportsmanship from both fighters. Good right knee from ZW to JP's body. They clinch, and JP looks for judo trip again. Underhooks for ZW, and ZW is able to get the takedown. ZW has the full mount, but JP quickly sweeps, and he's into ZW's full gaurd. ZW holding JP tight, controlling JP's wrists well. ZW looks for an arm triangle, but it's not tight and he let's go quickly. JP has his elbow on ZW's throat. ZW looks for the arm triangle again, but JP looks calm. No exchanges here, and ZW is the busier fighter. ZW's corner calls for a body triangle, bbut JP quickly postures up. Still in full guard, but not a lot of activity here. ZW still holding JP close. Ref stands up the fight due to inactivity of the fighters. JP lands a right leg kick as the round ends. To the scorecard!

Split decision! John Platt defeats Zach Ward via split-decision. Each judge scores it 29-28, but 2 judges give it to Platt. Very good fight. Both fighters left everything in the ring. Crowd is pretty pumped right now.

7:33 - Amateur Middleweight (185 lbs.) bout between Michael Dave (MD) and Eric Wilfong (EW). Do you know what "trust" is? It's being the camera dude, and standing on a platform 10 feet off the ground that you didn't put together. Also, more cat calls to the ring girl. She's 2nd in the MVP voting. Platt put up a nice effort in that last fight, but let's face it... the cards are stacked against him.

ROUND 1 - Fighters touch glove. Chris Bennett is in MD's corner. Bennett calling for leg kicks. EW circles to the left. Good short right-left combo lands to the head of EW. They clinch and MD flings EW againt the cage. EW on MD's back, with arms locked over MD's shoulder. Bennett whispering sweet nothings into MD's ear. MD tries to turn, and they fall to the mat. Looks like EW is working for an arm here. EW still on MD's back and transitions into a possible Rear Naked Choke EW sinks the hooks in, looking for the RNC. MD keeping good wrist control. MD pushes off the cage, but EW still has it locked on. MD still has good control of EW's hands. MD trying to slip out the back door, but EW still hanging onto the RNC. EW falling off to the left... too high up on MD. MD drives EW into the cage. Round ends, and EW looks frustrated.

ROUND 2 - Touch gloves again. Bennett tells MD to "Do what I say!" Nice right from MD. Return right from EW. Both throwing wildly, nobody landing anything solidly. They clinch, with EW's back against the cage. EW drops, and MD lands right knee to EW's head. EW drops, and MD takes EW's back. Similar position, different arrangement as last round. EW rolls, but MD takes the mount. MD rolls for an arm, but ends up on the bottom. EW on top, looking for side control. EW in MD's full guard. Neither fighters doing too much, but MD is doing a good job of keeping EW from posturing. EW stands in MD's full guard and throws big punches. EW falls back into MD's full guard. EW has his elbow pressed against MD's arm. Superman feint from EW, who is punching from the top as the round ends.

ROUND 3 - Lacy on her tip-toes this time. Trying to accentuate the calves, I guess. Work it, girl! Ref has to beg the judges to be ready. Here we go. touch gloves again. Left hook from MD misses. EW looks for the double leg, but gives up quickly. MD drops his hands and backs into the cage. EW takes the invite, and MD throws a quick combo that lands. They clinch and go to the mat, with MD pressed against the cage. Bennett tells MD to stand, and MD shakes his head No. He's tired. But MD summons the energy to use a kimura to roll EW over. MD in EW's full guard. EW keeping his leg against the cage, pushing. EW reverses position underneath, and the two are in a North-South position. EW may be looking for an armbar, as he slides to the side of MD. Now in a reverse crucifix, with MD on top. EW still looking for MD's arm. Quick burst from MD to pull his arm out, and they roll. EW on top as the round ends. Another fight in the hands of the judges!

7:48 - Reminder that I'm at the Belterra Casino... AND SPA! Gentlemen, you can get your blackjack on while your lady gets the mud bath or whatever.

Decision in. Eric Wilfong defeats Michael Dabe by Unanimous Decision.

7:50 - Amateur Welterweight (170 lbs.) bout between Joe Burnett (JB) and Brad Barron (BN). Burnett doesn't realize he still has his flip flops on. I don't think those are legal. Ah... off they come. Damn. Thought I'd get to see a first tonight. Umm... tight race for MVP with this ring girl... though she's lacking the underboob that the others have. That's like pitching with elbow tendinitis. Let's see if she can overcome.

ROUND 1 - Touch gloves. Wild hooks from JB. Clinch against the cage. Knees from BB. JB throws as he separates and lands a good one. Good leg kick from JB. JB charges in for the double leg and they go to the mat, with BB looking for the guillotine. Doesn't have it. JB postures up, but JB leaves an arm out as he comes back down. BB sinks in the triangle JB scrambles, but BB holds the triangle and rolls into the top position and rains down punches. JB doesn't tap, but the ref jumps in and stops the fight. Good stoppage. JB was defenseless there.

Brad Barron defeats Joe Burnett via TKO at 1:08 of the 1st Round. That's a popular time to end fights tonight.

7:57 - Amateur Welterweight bout between PJ Jackson (PJ) and Brian Francisco (BF). The Appletons are sharing a moment from opposite sides of the cage. Those kids are precious. The crowd still loves Lacy. She's... uhm... lovable. Yup. In the biggest upset of the evening so far, more women are cheering for Lacy than men. Either the men need to step up their game, or... wait... nevermind.

ROUND 1 - Touch gloves. Big right from BF misses. Right body kick from BF misses too. Big right from PJ misses, and BF counters with a straight right of his own that lands squarely on the chin of PJ. PJ hits the mat and BF pounces. The ref quickly stops the fight.

Brian Francisco defeats P.J. Jackson via KO at 0:20 of the first round. The announcer tells us that this was one of the fastest KOs in "Big Show MMA" history. Wow!

8:04 - The crowd tells the announcer that they are, in fact, enjoying the fights so far. Damn... not a lot of down time between fights here.

8:05 - Amateur Lightweight bout between Craig Neal (CN) and Justin Wallace (JW), who must be subbing for Jimmy Keefer. Bennett cornering Neal as well. The kid's working tonight, that's for sure. Just noticed the ad on the post for actualfighter.com... fakefighter.com must've been taken. Appleton (Jason, unfortunately) tells me that Keefer stepped on a nail and had to withdraw. That really sucks for him.

ROUND 1 - Touch gloves. Short riight from JW who follows with solid leg kick. The fighters punch their way into tlinch and quickly drop to the mat, with CN on top. JW looks for guillotine but can't get it. They reposition, and CN is on top, in JW's full guard. CN postures but leaves an arm out. JW grabs it and slaps on a triangle. CN standing bent over, but can't shake JW's triangle. CN offers a sort-of tap. He must have been drifting off to sleep. The ref jumps in and stops the fight. CN takes a couple of seconds to find himself, but he's no worse for the wear.

Justin Wallace defeats Craig Neal via triangle at 1:15 of the first round.

8:11 - Amateur Middleweight bout between Chris Cummins (CC) and Justin Unger (JU). Cummins has a fan section with him. The A/V guy directing the timing looks a little like Sam Kinison. Very nice. It really is a packed house tonight. Awesome atmosphere for fights! Also, Unger is rocking the fade, high and tight, with the camo shorts.

ROUND 1 - Touch gloves and both men are quick to throw. Nothing lands squarely. Clinch against the cage. JU looks for single leg and picks up CC. JU gets the take down, but falls into a guillotine that seems pretty deep. JU punching, but still in the guillotine. JU stays calm and is able to sneak his head out and gets the full mount,. Throwing punches from the top . CC tries to roll, but JU controls the body position well. JU keeps throwing. CC isn't protecting himself intelligently, and the ref leaps in to stop the fight.

Justin Unger defeats Chris Cummins via TKO at 1:00 of the first round.

8:18 - Time for the ladies to step into the cage. First time in "Big Show MMA" history. Check back next week for my article featuring the ladies and a discussion of women in MMA. This is a 155 lbs. match-up between Erica Ellington (EE) and Marissa Caldwell (MC). EE sporting the cornrows. The Cummins fans are letting the ref know that he sucks and he's "a fag" for stopping the fight, I guess. Those are some knowledgeable fans, boys and girls. Not homers at all. Nosiree.

ROUND 1 - The ladies smile at each other and cheer for each other during the announcement. Very nice to see. Touch gloves. MC throws leather quickly and lands a couple, stunning EE. MCpulls guard and drags EE to the mat. She quickly slaps on an armbar. EE stays calm, trying to pull her arm out. She's not tapping, but the arm is in deep. MC isn't letting go. EE still protecting her wrist with the other arm. The ref is asking EE to say tap, and EE refuses. MC lets go of the arm, and EE quickly brings the fight back to the feet. Upper cuts from EE in the clinch. Both throw punches, some landing. MC pulls guard again, and EE falls into MC's full guard. Short punches from EE from the top, and MC cinches up her full guard. MC slides her hips up and looks for triangle. She quickly transitions to an armbar that she gets. EE rolls to defend. She still won't tap. She's visibly in pain though. MC stretches out harder and EE is left with no choice but to tap.

Marissa Caldwell defeats Erica Ellington via armbar at 2:33 of the first round.

8:28 - The interviewer for this fight is the phantom superhot chick (SHC) from last time. I'm going to kill Jon if he doesn't get a shot of her. So SHC asks Marissa about going pro. Marissa says, "One fight at a time." Great answer. I like her. Erica is gracious in defeat as well. This was a big step for "Big Show MMA" and women's MMA. Well done, ladies. So, it's intermission time and Lorenzo's back on. I could keep observing and typing, but I don't like any of you that much. Be back in a few...

8:39 - Things I hate about MMA shows: Affliction shirts, moron fans. Things I love about MMA shows (other than the fights): that the women always are dressed to kill. I don't know who started that trend, but thanks.

8:44 - I just had a moment of clarity. I know that I talk about the ring girls and women and such. In my defense, when you come to an MMA show, you see fights and you see girls. That's about it. And if I were to rank my top 5 favorite things on the planet, a good case can be made for both cracking the list. So, that's what's up. If you find me sexist or whatever... well, you might be right. But I promise to (attempt to) redeem myself with my article next week.

8:50 - If you had 8:49 PM EST for the perfecta of Disturbed, Drowning Pool, God Smack, and Papa Roach, you're buying drinks tonight.

8:53 - Action to start back up here.

8:55 - Amateur Lightweight bout between Jacob Larter (JL) and Joe Miller (JM). Sam Kinison still rocking the headset and black polo. He's in the running for MVP tonight too.

ROUND 1 - Touch gloves. Big right hook from JM. Clinch against cage. JM drags JL to the mat... JM in mount dropping elbows to JL's face. JL looks to push out and stand, but JM hangs onto the mount. JL tries to roll, and JM takes his back. He gets the hooks in and is looking fro the RNC. JM throwing left hooks to the head of JL. JM flattens him out JL. JL doing a good job orotecting and JM still tgrowing from the top. JL tries to uekc JM off, but he's not going anywhere. JM may be getting to high... JL could sneak out the back door. JL stands and shakes JM. JL starts landing BIG shots from the top. JM scrambles and they stand. JL gets underhooks and controls the body position of JM. They exchange knees in clinch against the cage. They separate and both throw but miss. JM lands a big right hook. JL counters with with a straight right that stuns JM, who falls to the mat. JL pounces and the round ends with JL on top.

ROUND 2 - Touch gloves again. Both throwing wildly, think: Bonnar-Griffin. Clinch against the cage, and JL judo trips JM and takes top position. JL grabs an arm and looks for a triangle. JL able to sneak his arm out. Warning for JM grabbing the cage. JL tries to roll into an armbar. The 2 scramble, and as JM stands, JL pops up and lands a straight right that stuns JM, who recovers quickly. They're circling, seemingly resting for a moment. JM gets the double leg, and pulls out of a guillotine attempt on the way down. JM in JL's half guard, looking to get his leg out. Big body shots to the stomach of JL, followed by a big elbow to the head. More big elbows from JM. Solid body shots from JM, who still has a dominating position. The round ends with JM throwing big shots.

ROUND 3 - Touch gloves. Both guys look tired. Solid outside right leg kick from JM. Fighters circling. Another leg kick from JM. JM looks for the double leg, pauses, and gets it. JM in JL's full guard. JL's corner urging him to use the cage to stand up. JM moves to half guard. JL starting to throw from the bottom, and JM answers with some sweeping punches of his own. JL trying to control the wrists of JM and doing a pretty good job. Neither fighter throwing. JM postures up and throws some short punches. Elbow from JL from the bottom. JM still with the short punches. JM looks to mount, but JL defends well. Solid body/face combo from JM. JL holding JM close. JM landing solid body shots to the left side of JL. Big elbow from JM lands. JL' gotta be hurting. Can't believe he's not cut. Back to full guard just before the round ends.

Joe Miller defeats Jacob Larter via Unanimous Decision.

9:12 - Amateur Bantamweight (135 lbs.) bout between Brandon McMahon (BM) and Marcus Lewis (ML). Jason Appleton verifies that this is the first bantamweight fight for the Big Show. The small guys always bring a lot of action. Also, no-underboob ring girl lets us know what round we're in. Her fans are growing. Read that however you'd like. You're probably right either way.

ROUND 1 - Touch gloves. Both fighters thorw. End up in the lcinsh. Nice short rights to the body of ML. They turn the clinch, and ML is against the cage. The exchange knees. Tehey each have over under, and ML turns BM against the cage. BL able to trip BM and has top position... in BM's full guard. ML has the reach advantage, and is throwing some big shots from the top. ML quickly transition to side control and then the mount. Very impressive. BM slides through out the back, looking for a leg on his way. Can't get it. They roll and ML ends up back on top. BM rolls and takes the foot of ML, looking for a heel hook or knee bar. ML very careful in his movements. Reaches back and drops some hammerfists, but is grimacing in pain. BM not letting go of the foot. More hammerfist s. ML able to pull his foot out and falls back onto the ground in pseudo-side control, with a leg tangled with an arm of BM. The round ends with ML dropping more hammerfists.

ROUND 2 - Touch gloves. Right hook and straight left combo from ML that lands. They circle. Both throw and miss. Missed uppercut from ML. BM fakes a sho and stands, grabbing a guillotine that BL spins out of on the way down. On the mat, ML rolls into top position, in side control. Short fists and elbows from both fighters. BM able to slide his hips into full guard, and ML leaves an arm dangling, which BM grabs and quickly snaps on a triangle choke. ML quickly taps. BM helps ML up. ML is bleeding.

Brandon McMahon defeats Marcus Lewis by triangle choke at 1:13 of the second round.

9:23 - The ref is cleaning the blood while Sam Kinison gives me the stink eye. What the hell, man?! You're probably gonna be my MVP! Keep it up and see what happens!

9:24 - Amateur Welterweight Title Fight between Tyler Johnson (TJ) and Colt Helton (CH). Colt is the reigning champ. The schedule says this fight is set for 5x3 minute rounds. I've never seen that before.

ROUND 1 - Touch gloves. Circling. Right kick from TJ that CH jumps over. They throw punches into the clinch. CH able to get body control of TJ and takes the fight to the ground. TJ rolls and takes top position. CH tries to stand, but TJ takes CH's back and gets hooks in quick, sinking the RNC. As Joe Rogan says any time there's a submission attempt ever, IT'S IN DEEP. Only this time, it is. CH tries to punch behind his head, but the choke isn't going anywhere. CH taps. Looks like we have a new champ!

Tyler Johnson defeats Colt Helton via rear naked choke at 1:12 of the first round. Congrats to Tyler for the new bling he gets to sport.

9:31 - What's next for Tyler, you ask? "Whatever Big Show wants!" That's some power you have there, Appleton. But with great power comes great... nevermind. Even I'm not that douchey. On purpose.

9:33 - The ref still sucks, apparently. Bad times.

9:34 - Amateur Lightweight Title Fight between Scott Cornwell (SC) and Chris Bennett (CB). Bennett presently holds the belt. I feel like I should say something like, "We've never seen a more focused Bennett than tonight!" But I may face a lawsuit from Mike Goldberg if I did. So I won't. But I'm thinking about it, at least.

ROUND 1 - Touch gloves. Head kick from SC. CB pulls guard, but SC throwing some solid shots from the top. Upkick frrm CB lands to the face of SC, and CB looks for a triangle. He quickly transitions to an armbar. SC pulls his arm out. The 2 scramble, and SC takes Bennett's back in the commotion. Good left hands to the head of Bennett. We heard them quite loudly. CB controlling the wrists of SC. SC's tells the ref that CB is holding his glove, and the ref warns CB. Big left head kick from SC misses, but he spins into a roundhouse that hits right on CB's chin. CB absorbs it somehow and pushes forward. They clinch against the cage. A solid knee from CB and he pulls guard. SC tries to stand, but CB grabs an arm on the way up. He's got the arm bar locked on tight, and SC rolls, but quickly taps.

Chris Bennett defeats Scott Cornwell via armbar at 1:23 of the first round. Bennett keeps his belt, moving to 14-1. His pro career should be starting any minute now.

9:45 - Professional Heavyweight (265 lbs.) bout between Steve Banks (SB) and Dave Hess (DH). Banks doing the splits in warmups. Show-off.

ROUND 1 - Touch gloves. DH shoots for double leg... good sprawl by SB. DH trips, and SB looks to get on top. DH able to stand quickly. Over-under by DH, with SB against the cage. SB turns DH into cage, and throws a knee to chin of Hess... a glancing blow. DH is alright. SB with underhooks. SB is grabbing the cage, and the ref doesn't see it. DH still with back against cage, obviously. Now the ref sees it and warns SB. Outside knees from SB. DH not mounting much offense, but using the knee to protect himself from Sb's knees, which seem to be hurting. SB winding up for knee, and delivers. SB delivers another knee right to DH's balls. Ref pauses the action. DH is in pain. A lot of pain. SB's corner is telling DH to "be honest." Apparently DH "needs an Oscar" for his alleged acting performance. I'm gonna side with DH on this one. We've all been there, and SB was throwing some pretty stiff knees. The crowd is growing restless, and DH is still trying to recover. The ref is talking to DH while SB examines his fingernails in the corner. SB now offers an apology. All is forgiven, but Hess' balls must still be in his throat.

Looks like we're set to resume action. Touch gloves. DH moving gingerly. DH shoots for a double leg but can't get it. The 2 clinch, and SB is throwing knees. DH trips, but is up quickly. DH still moving gingerly, circling to the right. SB just misses a big left head kick. SB follows with some short punches. Hess drops to the ground, and SB lands a massive knee to the body of DH. More solid knees to the side of DH. Lather rinse repeat, about 5 times. DH verbally submits.

Steve Banks defeats Dave Hess via TKO (although I think it was a verbal submission) at 3:34 of the first round.

9:57 - Hess may want to reconsider whether he wants to get laid tonight.

9:58 - SHC interviewing Banks. He insisted upon having his arm around her. Who can blame him. Jon is sitting next to me not getting pictures of this. Jerk. And SHC has her hand right in the middle of Banks' back. Banks is a big, sweaty dude. I hope she loves her job. Because this certainly can't be the highlight.

10:00 - Professional Welterweight bout between Devon Plaisance (DP) and Roger Bowling (RB). I just saw a guy with a plain shirt that says "MMA." I gotta get me one of those. And the announcer just introduced Roger Bowling. The crowd loves him... maybe more than they love Lacy. I can see Lacy, and she's among those cheering. So she must be cool with it.

10:02 - This effing chick behind me is screaming her effing ass off for Bowling. We get it. You like him. Pipe down, sweetheart. I have to listen to my wife complain about me being out too late watching fights when I get home. Hmm... on second thought... scream away. Holy sh**. Bowling is totally getting laid tonight.

ROUND 1 - Good right from DP to get us started. But RB answers with a short right of his own. They clinch, and RB drops down, picks up DP and slams him hard to the mat. Good short lefts from RB from the top. RB postures up and starts throwing freaking bombs that can be heard anywhere. DP turtles up, and RB keeps throwing huge punches from the top. To the head. To the body. Back to the head. Back to the body. DP turtles even more, and the ref jumps in to save him. That was impressive. RB hits HARD.

Roger Bowling defeats Devon Plaisance via TKO at 0:41 of the first round.

10:07 - Yup. It's not a question of whether Bowling is getting laid. It's a question of how many times and/or how many different chicks.

10:09 - Appleton announces the MMA Big Show / XFC co-promotion where Bowling will finally take on War Machine. That's in September in Tampa, FL. It'll be live on HD Net. Good stuff.

10:10 - Professional bout (catchweight of 177 lbs.) between Chris Wells (CW) and Johnny Reese (JR). This is the Main Event and the last fight of the evening. Hope it's a good one.

ROUND 1 - Touch gloves. Reese stalks. Body kick from JR misses. CW moving, JR still stalking. Body shot from JR. Front kick from JR pushes CW away. Inside lef kick from JR. CW still hasn't thrown a punch. JR surges forward with some quick punches. CW finally engages, but JR lands a huge right that floors CW. JR falls on CW, who spins. JR obliges and takes his back. CW tries to flip and shake JR, but JR sinks in the RNC. CW goes to sleep. The ref pulls them apart. CW comes to, but seems to think the 2 are still fighting. He takes the ready position, and wants to engage. Someone from his corner has to come and tell him what's going on. Bizarre ending.

Johnny Reese defeats Chris Wells via rear naked choke at 1:19 of the first round.

Couple of things in wrapping up...

Jason Appleton wants me to mention Greg Hupp, who is the MMA Big Show matchmaker. Phenomenal job tonight, Greg. Top to bottom.

Also, Lacy Appleton isn't just a pretty face (and body). She's a ring girl tonight to promote beahotmomma.com. It's Lacy's new fitness program for pregnant and post-pregnancy women. Hey, ladies. Take note. Whatever she's doing is working.

Check back in next week for some comments on the show, as well as a completion of the article I started on Women's MMA.